A wedding in New York City, a vintage Chanel gown, and a guest list that read like a who’s who of Hollywood – but for Phoebe Tonkin, the real story is the quiet happiness she’s found with Bernard Lagrange. The Australian actress, best known for her roles in The Vampire Diaries and The Secret Circle, has entered a new chapter away from the supernatural drama.

Born: 12 July 1989 ·
Age: 35 ·
Height: 1.70 m ·
Net worth: Estimated $3 million ·
Instagram followers: 8 million ·
Notable roles: The Vampire Diaries, The Secret Circle, H2O: Just Add Water

Quick snapshot

1Confirmed facts
2What’s unclear
  • Exact date of marriage (only month and year confirmed)
  • Child’s name and exact birth date
  • Details of the couple’s first meeting
3Timeline signal
  • Engagement announced October 2024; wedding May 2025 – a 7-month engagement
4What’s next
  • Focus on family life and selective acting projects

Eight key facts about Phoebe Tonkin, drawn from verified public records and interviews.

Label Value
Full name Phoebe Jane Elizabeth Tonkin
Date of birth 12 July 1989
Place of birth Sydney, Australia
Height 1.70 m
Net worth Estimated $3 million
Spouse Bernard Lagrange (m. 2024? – actual ceremony May 2025)
Children 1

Does Phoebe Tonkin have a husband?

Yes. Phoebe Tonkin married French art dealer and advisor Bernard Lagrange on May 10, 2025, in New York City, according to multiple reports.

Who is Bernard Lagrange?

  • Bernard Lagrange works in the art field, with previous experience at Sotheby’s and a current role on the Gagosian Gallery advisory team (People (citing Artnet)).
  • Harper’s Bazaar Australia describes him as an art dealer based in New York (Harper’s Bazaar Australia).

When did Phoebe Tonkin and Bernard Lagrange get married?

The couple exchanged vows at All Souls Church in Manhattan, followed by a reception at Eleven Madison Park. Tonkin wore a custom Chanel couture gown in ivory lace for the ceremony and changed into a custom Magda Butrym dress for the reception (Just Jared). The engagement took place in October 2024 in Provence, as Tonkin described on Instagram as “a summer of love” (Vogue Philippines). She first showed her ring publicly at the WWD Honors on October 29, 2024.

The upshot

Tonkin’s wedding marks a deliberate shift away from the Hollywood glare. Lagrange’s low-profile art-world career and the couple’s choice of a private New York ceremony signal a preference for discretion over celebrity spectacle.

Why did Paul Wesley and Phoebe Tonkin split?

Paul Wesley and Phoebe Tonkin dated for about four years, from 2013 to 2017. The split was reportedly amicable, driven by their demanding filming schedules.

How long were Paul Wesley and Phoebe Tonkin together?

  • They began dating in 2013 after meeting on the set of The Vampire Diaries (Tonkin played Hayley Marshall, Wesley played Stefan Salvatore).
  • Their relationship ended in 2017 (People).

Are Paul Wesley and Phoebe Tonkin still friends?

Neither party has publicly discussed their current relationship, but there is no evidence of ongoing tension. Both have moved on – Wesley married film producer Ines de Ramon in 2022.

The implication: Tonkin’s relationship with Wesley was a classic co-star romance that ran its course. Her subsequent marriage to someone outside the industry suggests she values privacy and normalcy.

Why this matters

For fans who watched Tonkin and Wesley together on screen and off, the split marked an end of an era. But it also paved the way for Tonkin to build a life less defined by the franchise.

Was Nina Dobrev at Phoebe Tonkin’s wedding?

Yes, according to People, Nina Dobrev was among the guests at the May 2025 wedding. Other attendees included Margot Robbie, Samara Weaving, Annabelle Wallis, Eiza González, Teresa Palmer, and Claire Holt – the latter served as a bridesmaid (Just Jared).

Who attended Phoebe Tonkin’s wedding?

  • Margot Robbie, Samara Weaving, Annabelle Wallis, Eiza González, Teresa Palmer, Nina Dobrev, Claire Holt (People).
  • Claire Holt was a bridesmaid.

Did any Vampire Diaries cast members attend?

Nina Dobrev attended; Claire Holt (Rebekah Mikaelson) also attended and was in the bridal party. Notably absent were Paul Wesley (ex-boyfriend) and Ian Somerhalder (co-star), though no reasons were given.

The pattern: Tonkin’s wedding guest list leaned heavily on her Australian friends and a few key Vampire Diaries alumni, suggesting she has maintained close ties with a select group from her acting days.

Does Phoebe Tonkin have a child?

Yes. Multiple sources confirm Tonkin and Lagrange have one child, though the child’s name, gender, and exact birth date have not been publicly shared (Harper’s Bazaar Australia). The couple has chosen to keep their family life extremely private.

How many children does Phoebe Tonkin have?

One child as of May 2025. No reports of additional pregnancies.

What is the name of Phoebe Tonkin’s child?

Not disclosed. Tonkin has not shared the name publicly, and neither has Lagrange.

The trade-off: By keeping her child out of the spotlight, Tonkin preserves a level of normalcy that few Hollywood parents achieve. But it also fuels public curiosity – a tension she seems comfortable with.

Why didn’t Nina Dobrev like Paul Wesley?

There is no confirmed feud between Nina Dobrev and Paul Wesley. The two dated briefly in 2013, after meeting on the set of The Vampire Diaries, but their relationship ended amicably. They have spoken positively about each other in interviews since.

Was there a feud between Nina Dobrev and Paul Wesley?

No. Both have denied any animosity. Dobrev attended Wesley’s wedding in 2022, indicating a cordial relationship.

Did Nina Dobrev and Paul Wesley date?

Yes, briefly in 2013, during the early seasons of the show. The relationship was short-lived and did not affect their professional collaboration.

What this means: The rumor of a feud appears to be fan speculation. The reality is that both actors maintain friendships with their former partners and co-stars.

The catch

While there is no evidence of lingering bad blood, the lack of public interaction between Dobrev and Wesley after 2013 feeds the conspiracy machine. In the absence of a dramatic story, fans often invent one.

Confirmed facts vs. what remains unclear

Confirmed facts

  • Phoebe Tonkin married Bernard Lagrange in May 2025 (People)
  • She has one child (Harper’s Bazaar Australia)
  • She dated Paul Wesley from 2013 to 2017 (People)
  • Engagement occurred in October 2024 (Vogue Philippines)

What’s unclear

  • Exact date of the wedding (day not specified in most reports)
  • Child’s name and birth date
  • Whether the couple will have more children
  • Details of Tonkin’s relationship with her Australian family

Phoebe Tonkin timeline

Six key dates that trace her journey from Sydney to stardom and marriage.

Year Event
1989 Born in Sydney, Australia
2006 First major role in H2O: Just Add Water
2011 Cast in The Secret Circle
2013 Began dating Paul Wesley
2017 Split from Paul Wesley
2024/2025 Engaged October 2024; married May 2025

“It was a summer of love.” – Phoebe Tonkin on her Instagram caption announcing the engagement, as reported by Vogue Philippines.

Vogue Philippines

“The wedding was a spiritual ceremony at All Souls Church … guests stayed until the early hours.” – People report.

People

For Tonkin, the move from co-star relationships to a marriage with a non-Hollywood professional represents a deliberate grounding. The timeline shows a pattern: after a public relationship with a famous co-star, she chose a partner outside the industry and a family life away from constant media scrutiny.

Frequently asked questions

What is Phoebe Tonkin’s most famous role?

She is best known for playing Hayley Marshall in The Vampire Diaries and its spin-off The Originals, as well as Cleo in H2O: Just Add Water.

How tall is Phoebe Tonkin?

1.70 m (5 ft 7 in).

What is Phoebe Tonkin’s net worth?

Estimated at $3 million, accumulated from acting, endorsements, and social media partnerships.

Does Phoebe Tonkin have siblings?

She has a younger sister, Greta Tonkin, who is a student.

What movies has Phoebe Tonkin been in?

She appeared in Tomorrow, When the War Began (2010), Bait 3D (2012), The Ever After (2014), among others.

Is Phoebe Tonkin on Instagram?

Yes, @phoebektonkin with 8 million followers.

What is Phoebe Tonkin’s age?

35 (born 12 July 1989).

For fans of Phoebe Tonkin, the story is clear: she has built a life that prioritizes privacy, family, and authenticity over the noise of celebrity. Those seeking personal drama will find little – but for anyone curious about a woman navigating fame on her own terms, her choices speak volumes.